


Better Than Life

by Clea2011



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Arthur Pendragon Returns, Canon Compliant, Gen, Reincarnation, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-06
Updated: 2018-01-06
Packaged: 2019-03-01 01:59:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13284531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clea2011/pseuds/Clea2011
Summary: Arthur's return isn't as glorious as Merlin had hoped.





	Better Than Life

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a quick fill for the Serial Killers prompt on HC bingo.

Time did strange things to memories.  By the 21st Century Merlin knew that there were probably many people and events throughout his long life that he no longer recalled correctly.  A thousand years of memories crammed into one head would do that.

The Arthur that had finally returned to him was very different to the one that Merlin remembered.  This one was a spotty teenager who didn’t seem terribly interested in being a great leader.  He was at a very high level on World Battle Domination 4 though.

When Merlin had explained to him that he was the once and future king reincarnated, Arthur hadn’t even been sceptical.  He’d accepted it as if it was his right, barely questioning it despite the implausibility of the very idea.  For weeks Arthur had been following Merlin around, fascinated.  It was far from the glorious reunion that Merlin had lived for.

“Tell me again about our old lives,” Arthur begged again.  He didn’t seem to be able to let the subject go and was constantly asking about it.  Merlin had hoped at first that Arthur would remember his own past life and change back to his old self but that didn’t seem to be happening.  “Tell me about the battles.”

Arthur’s interest in fighting was still as strong. But that was probably just a result of all the online war games that he had played as he grew up.  Instead of practicing out in the fresh air with a sword, this Arthur won his battles on the computer with a keyboard.  He’d destroyed nations and conquered worlds.  All without leaving the comfort of his room.

“I mostly just tried to keep you alive,” Merlin admitted. “I didn’t pay attention to the way that the battles were going.”

“Was I brave? Did I have a sword?”

At least he realised there were swords back then.  That was something – Arthur didn’t appear to have paid all that much attention in his history classes.

“You had Excalibur.  You drew it from a stone just as the legend says.”

“Amazing…” Arthur mused.  “Did I kill people?”

“Arthur…” Merlin didn’t like the direction that the conversation was going.

“What?  I want to know what I was like.”

 _Well you didn’t dwell on death all the time_ , Merlin thought.  “You were a warrior prince, then a warrior king,” he explained. “And yes, you did kill people. In war that’s what happens.” He saw Arthur’s face light with interest, and sighed.  “It’s not glorious, Arthur.”

He could tell from Arthur’s face that he hadn’t taken that on board.  Sure enough a few moments later Arthur was asking questions again.

“What about you?  Did you kill people?”

Merlin sighed, really not liking the detached fascination Arthur had with death and killing.  At least he hoped it was detached. “It wasn’t a game, Arthur. Things were very different then.”

“So tell me.  I mean, you’re like living history aren’t you? My history.  Our history.”

It didn’t feel like theirs.  “Well, there was this sorcerer way back at the start.  Her name was Mary Collins, she was the first.  I didn’t have a choice – it was her or Arthur.”

“Me.”

“Yes, that’s what I meant.  Her or you.  And the others.  It was always to save you. I don’t really remember.”

Arthur was staring at him with awe.  “So we _both_ killed a lot of people. We were like medieval serial killers!”

“No!”  Except that was exactly what they’d been. He had a point.  “It was different back then,” he attempted again. “ _You_ were different.”

“I was king.  Come on, who else did you kill?  What about Morgana Le Fay?  She was Arthur’s enemy, right?  Hey, did I have sex with her like the legend? Kinky!”

“Morgana was Arthur’s half-sister.   And no he didn’t have sex with her.  Arthur was very honourable.  Morgana lost her way and turned against Arthur and Uther. Yes I killed her but I’m not proud of it.  If I’d been stronger I could have prevented everything just by trying to help her.  By then it was too late.  She’d gone too far and destroyed Arthur.  It was all for Arthur, everything I did. And I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

“For me! This is epic!”

Merlin paused.  Because although this man looked exactly like his Arthur and had the same name and everything, he was someone else entirely.  Arthur wasn’t like that.  He’d been trying for weeks, but to no avail. This wasn’t really Arthur.

“No,” Merlin said sadly, realising the truth. “Not for you.”

Arthur looked puzzled.  “But… why? Arthur and Merlin, that’s how the legends go.”

They did. 

But Merlin was still waiting for his Arthur to return. 

He suspected that he would be for a long time to come.

 


End file.
